Monday, June 30, 2008


i caught a fish. SEE!
big fish

i do not want to touch said fish. SEE!
i caught that fish

we saw SO MANY little piggies and their fat ass moms (like me). SEE!
pig butts

loree played on the swing. SEE!
loree on the swing

boyfriend and blake played in the lake water. SEE!
point and blake

Friday, June 27, 2008

do you keep a journal?

i mean, other than your blog? did you use to journal and then stopped and started blogging? i mean, what led you to blogging anyway?

i used to write and write and write. i have many journals written in from cover to cover. and i'm not talking about from when i was 16. it started soon after blake was born and then pretty much stopped once i moved in with boyfriend. i stopped having time to write. i stopped having things to bitch about. i mean, the majority of my journals were filled with my desire to find the man of my dreams.... how i refused to settle.... how i would know right off the bat that someone wasn't for me (or that he was). i chronicled other people's opinions of me, and then write about how wrong they were. how they didn't understand. how some people were so opinionated, yet knew so little.

i used to write all the time. i would drive to malibu literally every other weekend and write. i would sit in the back of my jeep and just stare at the ocean.. listen to the waves.. and write in my journal. when i look back at them now, they are virtually the same thing over and over again. "where is he?" "what's taking him so long?" all about love. when you don't have love, what else is there to write about really? :)

today i have a journal that gets written in maybe once a year. and then i have this blog. but the coolest thing i have? it's a journal for blake. i've been writing in it for years. i don't write often, but i think it will be awesome to give it to him one day when he's an adult and he can read back at all the things his crazy mom wrote and thought over the years. and that doesn't even include the things i've written in this blog about him.

what about you?

Thursday, June 26, 2008

stick your fiber where the sun don't shine

so you all know i think i'm a fat ass.

and really, i do want to do something about it. (thank you to both shelly and smug for recommending i signed up today, but will probably forget to go there tomorrow and the next day, so...yeah).

and since i'm a total sucker and will most likely try anything once, i started thinking- "hey, i don't think i get enough fiber in my diet!! and fiber is supposed to like, clean out your inside.. so yeah! i'll start eating fiber cereals everyday for breakfast! i'll be skinny in no time!!!!!" right. 5 bowls of raisin bran and grape nuts later, i feel like i'm dying. literally. i feel like i'm being stabbed in the stomach with numerous knives for the enjoyment of children everywhere.

so fuck the fiber. i'm not doing it anymore. feeling like death isn't worth it.

so i ask you, dear readers. what is your surefire way to lose weight? do you have one? should i be eating something i'm not (if someone says fiber so help me..). supplements? vitamins? starvation? puking after meals (so LA)... help! and thanks!

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

and.. i'm still a fat ass

it's true. the married 15 i've gained since being married (FOR ONE YEAR MIND YOU).. is still hanging on. hell, it's probably more like the married 20 now. it won't go away. granted, i don't eat all that well. i mean i did have some cake last night. and i'll probably have some tonight too.

i don't know. this weight. it's just chillin. hanging on in the same places it always does. and apparently it REALLY doesn't want to leave. i don't think it's fair that i have to practically starve myself to lose any weight. i don't want to live that way. i'm not strong enough to deny myself actual food. i like to eat. and i like to eat things that make me a fat ass.

i've come to accept that i have to work out. i still hate going, but the point is- i DO go. not without complaining that's for sure. but i have slowly started my routine again. working out at least 4 days a week, 5 is ideal. but i'm still a fat ass. seriously. my jeans? they're going to bust at the seams. i already ripped one pair. it's true.

sometimes being a woman just isn't fair.

sometimes being a fat ass who can't get rid of her fat ass is even less fair.

can't wait to see you all at blogher! ha!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

the post where i'm white, and trashy

i opened the fridge to move some things around and a beer can fell on my toe. so there's my toe, bleeding all over the place, black and blue already- and all i'm thinking is, "if i broke my fucking toe because a fucking can of beer fell on it, should i move into a double wide now, or later?"

Monday, June 23, 2008

for our anniversary....

boyfriend got a new wedding ring.

i was tired of being the only one married in this relationship dammit. if i'm wearing an advertisement that i'm NOT available, then so is he.

happy 1 year married anniversary boyfriend!!! you're the biggest pain in the ass i know, but you're also the hottest.

i feel like i've been married to you my whole life. and that's not only a good thing, it's the best thing.

"i don't know what brought us together.. what strange forces of nature conspired, to construct the present, from the past..."

funny faces

if you're so inclined, check out the posts from last year at this time.... they made me all swoony.

Friday, June 20, 2008

appreciation is...

someone asked blake the other day.. "was new york the best vacation you've ever been on??"

blake answered with, "no way!!!"

so obviously, the next question was, "really? then what was?"

to which he resonded with, "LA is!!! nothing beats la. it has the dodgers and disneyland!!"

so there you have it. if it's not la, it's not the best! (he is definitely MY kid)

i can't believe he's TEN today! happy birthday blake! you're the best and most awesome kid ever (except when you're not).

funny faces at the history museum

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

speaking of missing things..

i cannot shake st lucia. our honeymoon. seriously, something is mentally wrong (or right) with me.

it's just weird because it's totally uncontrollable. it's as if these feelings are running everything about me. i can't breathe without thinking about the wedding, or our honeymoon from last year. i sit here and am totally consumed. i want it all back. i want to do it all again.

i want to be in st lucia, sitting on a floaty in the pool.. lounging around. i want to do nothing. i want to be lazy. i want to hang out in the sun and drink stupid drinks with banana's in them, because everything in st lucia has banana's. i want to go eat dinner at the pier restaurant, and sit in the hot tub at midnight (when it's still hot out), hang out with our newly made friends (who are still our friends).. oh man, i just want to be there again. i want to be there right now. i am longing and feening for that trip again. i miss it. i miss everything about it.

am i losing it, or is this somewhat normal... cause i'm about to see how cheaply i can get so st lucia tomorrow.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

i am reliving last year..

wow. today it totally hit me. these overwhelming feelings of.. OMG, last year at this time, i was planning the wedding.. counting down the days until it was here.. freaking out (apparently).. my mom was threatening my then fiance (lamest word EVER)... and i couldn't of been more excited or happier!!!!!!!!

and i miss it!!! i know it's crazy. but man i miss the anticipation.. the looking forward to it all. i couldn't wait to see all my friends and be with my family and just have a huge party. and today, i'm sitting here in my office, almost drowning in emotion. i can't shake the feelings. it's so overwhelming. i am feeling the way i felt then. the excitement is welling up in my stomach as if i'm going to get the chance to relive it all again (but with less wind). and it's crazy. this feeling is crazy.

maybe it's just because it was literally this time last year. maybe my subconscious

just totally remembers the time of year and it relives things on cycles? it's possible. you think? or am i just totally crazy.

man. i miss our wedding!!!!!!

and more laughing

Friday, June 13, 2008

drunk texts are awesome!


getting drunk texts from your friend is like a game. not only do you get to text back and forth with someone, but you get to try to figure out what the hell the person on the other end is talking about. it can be quite entertaining.

there's nothing like getting a text that says, "goin drinkin."

and then about 10 minutes later getting another that says, "wut up hos."

you know these texts are only going to get better and better as the night progresses. and i can only assume that by this point, my friend is totally wasted and having a good time. the proof? a text that said,

"yOUR driNK'8 Il?"

i don't think i wrote back to that one. because seriously, what the hell does that even say? i totally don't know, but they make me laugh.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

wanna win some fruit roll-ups??

YES, you do!!!!!

fruit roll-ups has this new thing where you can design your own fruit roll ups!!!! how fun is that?!?! super fun! i designed baseball ones for blake's travel baseball team and he was so excited when he unwrapped them and saw his team name and his number on it. he was like "HOW DID YOU DO THAT MOM??!? THAT'S SOOOOO COOL!!!!" they have tons of designs to choose from. you can personalize them to say whatever you want. the process is very easy, fast, and fun!

so now, fruit roll-ups has made me the coolest mom ever.

and you can be too. head on over to the site and tell me what design you would choose! post it in the comments section and then i'll choose someone at random to get their very own box of fruit roll-ups!

dude, it's exciting. you know it.

this post brought to you by the parent bloggers network.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

how it all happened...

so i haven't even told you how we tricked blake and how the morning went on our way to new york.

first of all, we let him sleep in. when he woke up (on the day of a field trip no less) he was like, "MOM IT'S 8:20!!!!!!!" i pretended to rush to get us in the car. boyfriend was home with us so we told blake that i had to drop him off at a meeting. as we passed the exit to his school, blake was clueless. it wasn't until we were almost in san francisco that he started asking where we were going and started to get cranky that he was going to miss his whole entire field trip. boyfriend told him that his meeting was at the san fran airport. when we got to the airport, blake was all, "just drop him off." i laughed. when i parked the car and told blake to get out, he didn't want too. he didn't understand WHY he needed to get out of the car. he wanted me to dump boyfriend off and get the hell outta there.

that's when he got out of the car and we opened the back. we started pulling suitcases out and his face was priceless. he was like.. "what are we doing?????" and he totally thought we were going to LA. HAH. we showed him the tickets to chicago and he just got really confused. he kept asking a million times WHY we were going to chicago. did we have any friends there? what the hell are we going to do there? WHY ARE WE GOING TO CHICAGO?!?!?! the only thing i could think of was that the cubbies and wrigley field was there. he seemed okay with that answer, but still not too sure why the hell we were going to chicago.

i guess by the time we landed, he had accepted it all. that's when we told him that we had one more plane to get on. that we weren't going to chicago, but new york instead!!!! instead of being excited, i think we made his brain explode. he almost broke down. i think he's a lot like me- gets mentally prepped for something and then freaks out if you change it. poor kid.

but i will tell you- once we left our hotel room at 1:30 in the morning to go get a slice at ray's... the kid was in love. with the pizza. with the fact that we could and were walking around at 1:30 in the morning. that it was warm out. that there were tons of people out. that there was a pizza place open!

so yeah. that's how we tricked blake.

and yes people, boyfriend looks miserable and pissed off in all pictures because
  • he hates having his picture taken (i obviously don't care about this fact and insist on making him take pictures with me)
  • he refuses to smile in pictures (because he is mean and nasty)
  • he doesn't really like cities, or crowds (welcome to new york)

Monday, June 09, 2008

new york rawked!

well we're back!!! the trip was super fun. the weather was great (we didn't melt) and the yankee game was awesome. blake was totally shocked and surprised. he is now officially in love with new york pizza (good boy). and he is also officially terrified of the subway.

us at yankee stadium

steps of the history museum

funny faces

blake the drunk

blake and lego chewie

Friday, June 06, 2008

LOOK! it's me.. in new york!


from 2003 that is. HAHAHA

so, what'cha doin?

i'm probably doing something fabulous and fun in NEW YORK CITY (new york city!?!) right now.... well not, right, right now- cause right now i'm still in california...

but when you read this, i'll be in NY.. seeing friends i haven't seen since the wedding.. and a new baby for the first time in real life.. and doing touristy stuff with blake (and hopefully taking about a million and a half pictures).


can't wait to come back and tell you all about it! you know, if you're still reading and stuff.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

obsession is....

me. and this song.

not to mention THIS SONG!

i heart usher. i heart chris brown.

hell yeah.

swoon to the first song.. and rock out to the second.

*waves hi to my sister and nephew*

know what's fun?

that blogger has a feature where you can post date your blog posts. so see, like right now, you all know i'm really in new york. you also know i'm not freaking posting from there either. but here it is... a post from me.

well i'm in cali while i write this. but i'm going to have it post while i'm gone. cause i can. and cause it's fun. and well- i'm going to do a bunch of those, cause it makes me laugh to think about all these stupid blog posts posting when i'm nowhere near a flipping computer.

suck it.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

depressing is....

driving in clear blue skies and warm weather everywhere you look except....

for the dark raincloud that is literally hovering over where you work. (did i mention the wind and cold in said cloud??)

so suck it! we're off to new york!

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

moving announcements that are SO cute!

well, at least i think so!

moving announcement

when parent bloggers asked if anyone was interested in ordering announcements of some type for their latest review, i jumped all over it! i mean, we had recently just bought a house and moved, and i hadn't formally sent anything out yet. this was the perfect opportunity for me to get some awesome moving announcements!

i didn't know when i signed up that tiny prints was the sister company of wedding paper divas. our wedding invitations were from wedding paper divas. things just got more exciting!

first things first... i went to the website. they don't have a huge selection of moving announcements, but they had enough. they had some cute ones that combined a new baby with a new pad, but that didn't apply to me, so all of those designs were out (almost). they had many different types of designs, as well as ones you could personalize with a picture. i really thought that that was what i would want to do- get an announcement with a picture of us on it. i didn't end up choosing that one, although i can't remember why at this point.

i actually ended up playing with a few different designs before deciding on this one. the process was easy, fun and very detailed. you get to approve what your design will look like before ordering (to ensure your announcement is error free). the shipping was extremely fast. they were boxed and packaged so that your cards do not arrive at your home bent, or messed up. they were perfect!!

if i had one improvement for tiny prints, it would be that the cards themselves would come in a variety of color options. i know that at their sister site, if you click on a card you like, 3 or 4 (or sometimes more) color choices come up. so for example, the card that i chose had a blue border with white dots. while i love the blue, maybe someone else would have liked that card in green, or yellow, or pink. i would think that would be an easy enough option and honestly, i'd apply the change to every moving announcement they offer. it gives the illusion of more choices that you can personalize to suit you that much more. there was one announcement that i really liked, but since it was only offered in the color shown, that turned me off to it. had they offered numerous color choices, i would have probably chosen that one.

other than that, i highly recommend them for all your announcement needs. they're quick, easy and fun to use!!! and the announcements are durable (no crappy thin paper here) and just as cute as they look online! :)

Sunday, June 01, 2008

love is...

love is getting a splinter out of your wife's ass, without laughing or mocking her.

love is also allowing your husband to get said splinter (FROM YOUR ASS WHILE YOUR PANTS ARE AT YOUR ANKLES AND YOU'RE TRYING YOUR HARDEST TO ATTEMPT TO BE SEXY WHILE ASKING OVER AND OVER "DO YOU SEE IT?? I PROMISE THERE IS A SPLINTER THERE!!!") without making him put on a blindfold, when all you really want to do is have him get the splinter out of your ass cheek, without actually having to look at your ass.