Thursday, November 29, 2007

i don't mean to be a downer

but divorce is truly an ugly thing. it brings out the worst in people. the mean parts. the nasty, bitter, greedy, evil parts. parts that otherwise people hide. or don't show. i'd like to say it brings out sides that don't normally exist- but can you truly show a side of yourself that isn't there otherwise? i don't think so. it's always in there somewhere... you don't just suddenly turn into someone you're not. i think we all have the ability to be many things- "it's the choices we make when we think no one's watching that truly define our character."

the fact that both my sister's and my mother's divorces have gone on for the past 3 years is nothing short of ridiculous. the fact the my father had my mother served with legal papers over the thanksgiving holiday, is nothing short of fucked up. i will never believe that the timing of that wasn't intentional. the fact that my ex brother in law served my sister with the most ridiculous legal papers ever last night, asking for an insane amount of money that she could never ever possibly have (when he has plenty of fucking money) is nothing short of greedy, malicious, and pathetic. how he even sleeps at night is beyond me.

the lengths to which people who once loved eachother go to hurt eachother- truly disgusts me. i can't stand seeing people i care about in so much pain. people who have had to deal with this bullshit on and off for the last 3 years, and we wonder why they're so beat down emotionally. can you imagine having to go through all of this turmoil for the length of 3 years? and knowing that it's only continuing and NOT getting better or going away? where the fuck is the light at the end of the tunnel for them? i feel bad that they have to go through this. i feel bad at how ugly it all is. and i just wish it was easier and simpler and whole lot less nasty. but i think people just truly lose sight of things when money is involved. and people turn into greedy fuckfaces who don't see the reality of situations. nevermind the kids, or what is best for them- let's just make sure we can financially fuck their mother so hard, she'll never see straight again. cause that's what really matters right?
making her pay.
and then turning it all around so that you feel okay with your actions. vindicated. so your kids don't have a house to live in... as long as you feel justified, it's not really your problem right? cause it's all about you. and as long as your poor wittle feewings are intact, no one else matters. not even your kids- no matter how many times you try to say they matter- actions will ALWAYS speak louder than words.

and right now.. your actions tell me that you are spineless, poor excuse for a man. and the fact that my nephew has you as a role model makes me want to vomit. i can only hope he grows up to be nothing like you.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

i have to go to LA now

but i leave you in the loving hands of the many green day fans who are visiting this site once again (even though they keep referring to me as "the mom".. and it freaks me out to no end... i think it's because the word mom just makes me think of someone old, and boring, and totally sucky). may you all take good care of eachother in my absence. lol

i wish i had something more to say, but really... i suck lately. i've got nothing. truly. it's really quite fucked up if you ask me.

Monday, November 26, 2007

green day & jenn ster

one day i was minding my own business looking at my stats for this here blog when i noticed that i had over 900 unique views for the day so far. and it kept climbing with each passing minute.... seriously. by the next check, it was almost up to 1000.

now i don't know about you, but i don't get anywhere near 900 page views a day unless amalah links to me, or the sky is falling, or pigs are flying. so i had to figure out where the hell all these people were coming from.

*cue music*

it was all because of this here post.

every green day fan site known to man was linking and talking about this blog and this picture of blake and billie joe. we're talking about blogs and forums in all languages & countries.

then the comments started coming in. and then the emails. oh, the emails. asking if my son realizes he met the "god of punk." someone also wondered if billie gave me his phone number. when i responded with a no, she promptly wrote back inquiring "email addy?" um, that's a big no, over. and then questioning me as to WHY he has facial hair?! um, because he didn't shave?? how the hell should i know?

i don't mind actually. i totally get that these people are uber fans of billie joe and green day (hello green day spelling nazi, i've been spelling the band name correctly for you- you know, putting the space between green and day. i'm hoping it helps you sleep more soundly at night) and they want to know every single detail about the concert and what he was doing, and who he was with, and what he was wearing, etc. i've answered every email i think. even when it's just been to respond with a "i have no idea" because i don't know half the shit these people are asking me. lol

i would have done the same thing when i was in love with a band years ago, had i had the opportunity, so i get where it's all coming from. i just think it's funny how some of them are so riled up that bj went to a hannah montana concert. like it is the worst thing that he could possibly ever do. it's not like he's killing puppies onstage people. and then i think it's sweet that others are trying so hard to be understanding. i guess it's just funny how we treat and judge celebrities we don't know, but think we do. and how we try to understand their mentality when they do things we don't think they should be doing.... when the bottom line is, he's just a regular guy who is a dad and a husband and also in a band. right? maybe when some of his fans have kids, they'll understand the shit you do for your children. things you wouldn't normally do, but you do because it makes them happy. and that is what makes you happy. becoming a parent takes away your ability to be 100% selfish..... and in all honesty, you don't want to be anymore.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

i'm like the stores.

fuck it. it's christmas NOW on this blog. and it's still thanksgiving night. what'cha gonna do about it? :)

happy gobble gobble

hope your day is great... and yummy.

this makes me laugh.. lol


Wednesday, November 21, 2007

1 way in which i torture trish

whenever i run downstairs to tell trish something.. or ask her something.. or need her for something.. or want to say hi.....


it's as if she KNOWS i'm coming, and leaves her office.

so i do things like this to her. you know, to remind her how evil and mean she is...

trish torture- day 1

and because it makes me laugh.

Monday, November 19, 2007

finding a house is hard!

why do i feel like the only person who is taking 10 years to find a house?? all of my friends who started house shopping, found a house in like no time flat. before you knew it, they were making an offer, giving their 30 day notice and moving out. it hasn't been that way for us at all.

we can't even find a house we both like. and while i totally trust that things will work out when and how they're supposed too- it's still a bit frustrating when you're ready to get the show on the road, and the show won't budge.

how long did it take you to find your first house?

Friday, November 16, 2007

let's talk camera's (and lenses)!

alright everyone! i know that most of you (if not all) are picture taking freaks (in a good way). so let's talk camera's! let's talk lenses!!!

i already know what kind of camera i want. the canon xti (body only). i've been researching and reading and reading and researching all sorts of lens options (i think my brain just exploded inside my head). i know that i want a lens for pretty much everyday shooting. and i know that i need a zoom lens for blake's baseball pictures- and whatever else. ideally, i'd like 1 lens that fits both needs.

so.. what type of camera do you have and do you like it? what type of lenses? talk to me people! i need your input! :)

ps- i know what the numbers on the lenses mean, so you don't have to dumb it down for me. lol

Thursday, November 15, 2007

too busy to help others

when did we (as a society) simply become too busy to stop and help out others? people get in car accidents... and no one stops. people are broken down on the side of the road... and no one stops. remember when people used to stop? remember when it mattered more to help someone, than to get to work on time?

i wonder if it's because we assume that everyone these days has a cell phone, so they can call for help on their own? or i wonder if it's because we don't think it's safe to stop and help strangers anymore? we're so untrusting of people that if we did stop and help and something bad happened, it would just be further proof of how you can't trust anyone anymore. and how the person who stopped to help was an idiot, because look what happened to them.

i have been that car on the side of the road that people kept driving past. they would look, but they would keep on driving. not one single person stopped to help me. not one. i didn't have a cell phone. i was young. i was alone. and i had no clue what the hell to do.

i will admit that i have definitely been the car who didn't stop for someone on the side of the road before. but i have also been the one who has. i remember one time when i was driving to my moms for the holidays. there was an older couple broken down on the side of the freeway in their rv. the hood was popped and the man was looking in. no one was stopping to help. but i did. and when i pulled over, he was SO thankful. he said they had been there for at least 30 minutes and not one single person had stopped. i had a cell phone and he didn't and they were simply too old to walk along the freeway to get to an offramp. he made a call from my phone, thanked me profusely and i drove off- thinking about them the rest of my drive.

it felt good to help them. what are your thoughts on this?

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

giving blog love

a friend of mine opened up a new blog to help women blog anonymously about any kind of abuse they have gone through, or are going through in their life. physical, mental, emotional.. you'd be surprised at how many women have gone through some form of abuse. saddened even. personally, i feel that i was in a pretty emotionally abusive relationship at one point in my life. and although it wasn't physical, the words that were said were just as painful.... and took longer to heal than any physical bruises would have. i learned a lot about myself from that relationship, and i vowed to never be that weak again. to never let someone have that kind of control over me and to never allow someone to speak to me or treat me in such a way. i hate who i was then. and i can't ever believe i was her. i never viewed myself as a weak person, but i certainly was then. never.again.

on a completely different note, with the holidays coming up, i wanted to direct your attention to this kick ass website called recipe town! it has tons of recipes, and links to food specific blogs and i basically want to lick my computer screen right now (hello chocolate cake in the upper right hand corner- YUM)!!! katy's kitchen is awesome with all sorts of super yummy recipes.. and there are the chocolate recipes, and the cheese recipes.. and and and.. *licks screen again*

so there you have it! getting your ass kicked, and ass kicking food! what more can you want?

oh, i know... FREE STUFF! i can't believe i almost forgot to include my new favorite blog on here! is a blog that lists all sorts of giveaways.. from simple blog contests, to big time prizes from big time companies. this site is fun and updated daily and i love it!

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

bawling like a baby

i cannot watch extreme home makeover without totally crying. i could miss the whole entire show and just see the parts where the family sees their new home, and i'll bawl like a freaking baby. it's ridiculous.

speaking of babies... i want one. i think i've come to the conclusion that i really truly want a baby. i know that boyfriend and i were torn awhile back on what we wanted to do (i can't find that freaking post for the life of me.. I FOUND IT! IT IS HERE!!!)- and in all honesty, i think he could go either way with it. but i'm set. i totally want one. it's kind of on my mind a lot lately, which super annoys me because i do not want to be that girl. but it's weird right?!?! does that mean i'm running out of eggs? lol no really. why do i keep thinking about having a baby in my belly??! maybe it's cause a lot of my friends are pregnant?!?! hell, that stuff never phased me before. what is wrong with me?!?!?

now don't get all excited cause we're not doing it for at least a year and a half (if not longer)... but i think i can say out loud that i want a baby with the man i love! don't be scared when you read this boyfriend.. it's all going to be ok. lol

Saturday, November 10, 2007

santa shit in my starbucks


i'm sure everyone else thinks it's too early.. and in all honesty, i think i used to freak out that christmas came right after halloween too.. but not anymore!!! there is something about this time of year that is so fucking overjoyous. i love everything about it. the way i feel inside.. the way others treat eachother... the way things look and smell and I AM SO EXCITED FOR THE HOLIDAYS!!!!!!!!!!! and i'm happy that everyone is already holiday'ed out. i get 2 whole months of the christmas spirit instead of just one. and that rocks my friends.

the end.

Friday, November 09, 2007

why ticket brokers should die.

i truly don't understand the ticket world. first of all, how the hell did ticketmaster get the monopoly on selling ALL THINGS tickets? from concerts and sports, to plays and musicals. if you want to buy a ticket to anything, it's through ticketmaster. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? and why do they have no competition?!?!?! someone open a fucking competitor stat! seriously. i mean, ticketmaster can have a $10 dollar service charge, then a $4 dollar printing charge, $2 dollar to scratch my ass charge, etc and so forth and you have no choice because NO ONE ELSE SELLS TICKETS!!!!!! it's weird. and kinda fucked up.

another thing. why the fuck is scalping tickets illegal, but ticket brokers are perfectly legal?!?!? why are there no regulations on ticket brokers? how come it's legal for them to mark up a ticket price by 1000 % and get away with it?? i don't understand it. and why do musicians allow it? i mean, it's not news to anyone that hannah montana concert tickets were virtually bought out by the ticket brokers (which they do for EVERY popular concert and sporting event) and then they mark up the tickets by HUNDREDS, if not THOUSANDS of dollars and attemp to sell them. how come they can do this? is there no way to regulate and put a stop to this? no way to monitor brokers and give them a percentage they can mark up, but cannot go past that?! i just think it's beyond messed up that they do this. it's so greedy and so money motivated, it makes me sick. i feel like hannah montana's camp has to know that her tickets were selling for over 1000 a ticket in most areas. why isn't there outrage? why don't musicians band together to put a stop to ticket brokers? i mean, doesn't it offend them. i'm sure they don't see any of that profit. and i'm sure they wouldn't want their fans to pay 1000 to see them in concert, or they would have made the tickets that much to begin with. know what i mean?

i'm just pissed off. and i want to do something about it. i want to put a stop to brokers and the insane way they do business. it can't be legal, and if it isn't... how come they get away with it? and does anyone have a good way to actually cut down on this type of stuff? i guess with the internet, it makes it way too easy for anyone to get tickets to things. like why doesn't ticketmaster try to fight this kind of thing? i'm sure it's because they don't really care. BUT WHY DOESN'T ANYONE CARE?!?!? why isn't anyone else pissed off? this has to stop. but i don't know how. BUT I WANT TO KNOW HOW.

Thursday, November 08, 2007

the post where i piss off the dream team

thanks everyone for your comments to the post below. they were reassuring and helpful and i really appreciate them.

i called off the dream team yesterday from meeting with the people regarding the house. they got mad. yes, you read that right. i think they were frustrated and i totally get that, but still- i ended up feeling like shit. here's the thing.... when we made the offer on that house originally, i remember praying they wouldn't take it because i didn't want the house. i was RELIEVED when the agent was a dick and found myself happy that we weren't in negotiations over a house i wasn't into and didn't truly want. but months later, half of the dream team told me that when the listing on the house expires, they were going to find the owners and talk to them. i didn't ask them to do that, and i wasn't sure they were doing it for us. i had expressed to the dream team that i was happy the offer was rejected because i didn't really like that house. they must have "not heard" that part even though i said it more than once, and left it on a voice mail or two. i figured they were going to meet so they could take them on as a client, or to find out if their agent even presented the offer or not (to get him in trouble or something.. i dunno). i didn't think they were doing it for us, since i hadn't expressed anymore interest in that house. and in all honesty, boyfriend and i thought it was funny that they were going to pay the owners a visit. we thought it was probably the highlight of their otherwise boring day. neither one of us truly thought they were doing this on our behalf.

but i guess we were wrong. and they had all the wrong impression. so when i called to tell them not to go on our behalf and that i didn't like the house and didn't want it, they were pissy. one half of the dream team had to get off the phone with me he was so pissed, while the other half called me immediately following and was mad as well. anyway, it just sucked. and while i fucking felt bad, i was also pissed off. i never asked them to go in the first place. i never asked them to pursue the house. and while i was encouraging when they DID say they were going to meet with them, i did so because i thought it was funny- and i thought they were going on their own accord. but they thought i was encouraging because i wanted them to get the deal on the house done.


so anyway. that's where we're at. with a half pissed off dream team, and no house on the horizon. you know what i keep hearing echoing in my head? someone (i can't remember who) posted in comments awhile back about how it was a "buyer's market"... and did i have a "buyer's agent"? and sometimes i wonder. i truly wonder.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

confused. so damn confused.

remember the house that we made an offer on and the realtor laughed at us? the guy said he was sorry to say that he even looked at our offer? well apparently he never presented the offer to the owners of the house (which i SO already knew).

well the owners found out that an offer was made and they weren't informed of it. and said owners are pissed. and the dream team (my realtors) are going to meet with them on friday. and now i feel like before i know it, i'm going to be making another offer on this house i don't even like!

so i'm torn. i mean, what if we can get this house for relatively cheap (in california real estate terms) and that makes our mortgage really affordable for us? is it worth it to live in a house you don't like? seriously? cause i'm thinking it's not. i mean, if you don't like a house, you don't like a house. right? the problem with the house isn't the paint or the carpet, or the fact that is so dated it needs tons of work. the problem is with the way certain areas are designed and the fact that the house is small. the bathrooms are weird and i loathe the master bathroom. it sucks. i feel like we would grow out of the house fairly quickly and i do not like going into something with the intention of leaving it shortly thereafter. know what i mean? i like stability. and why would i move into that house if i intend on leaving it in a year or two? i just don't know what to do. i really don't. so i guess we'll wait and see what friday brings. but what would you do? would an affordable mortgage be worth it to live in a house you truly don't like and don't want to live in???

Monday, November 05, 2007

it's just your everyday saturday night

cut to trish's backyard. well, not even her backyard. past her backyard, into the community yard thing and then picture the following... 6 chicks who work together laughing, screaming, jumping and taking SIXTY NINE pictures every 5 seconds. the camera is flashing. we're yelling out orders "do fish faces! now flip the bird. be gross! charlie's angels!!!!" hysterical girly laughter follows. dogs howl. little kids cry.

not really.

we like to spank

we flip the bird with mean faces

hanging out with our wangs out

charlies angels

Sunday, November 04, 2007

loving natalee

i just finished reading the book "loving natalee" by natalee holloway's mom, beth.


you'd have to be living under a rock the past couple of years to not have heard the story of natalee holloway, the high school senior who went missing the last night of her senior trip in aruba. the story itself, had always saddened me. i mean, i get totally caught up and involved in SOME missing person cases (i say some, because not all affect me.. only certain ones do.. just add that to my list of weirdness). they break me. i don't know why, but they do. natalee's story just sucked from the moment it happened. even before reading the book, i had thought the 3 boys who were with her the night she disappeared, knew exactly what happened to her. and with the news stories that followed, i sat there scratching my head at how the boys had basically admitted to something bad happening to her, and then they retracted it.. and their stories changed two or three times.. and how the main suspects (joran van der sloot) dad was friends with the cops, and how the whole case just seemed super fucked up and botched and just not right. i don't know anyone who thinks those 3 boys are innocent. they know exactly what happened to her, and after reading this book, i believe that even more.

this book didn't give me a ton of information that i didn't already know (although there were definite jaw droppers, head scratchers, and heartbreakers), but what it did tell me, was just further proof of how messed up this case was from day one. i felt and still do feel bad for beth holloway. i guess you never truly realize just how differently cases are handled in another country, until you have to personally deal with one. beth's account of the days leading up to natalee's trip in aruba is just heartbreaking, because you know what's coming. her stories about the police and how she was treated and handled, is frustrating as a reader. you feel her pain. you put yourself in her position and you never wish that type of shit on anyone. she talks in her book about how you expect certain things just from growing up in the united states. and you expect these procedures to carry over no matter what country you're in, but that is just simply unrealistic. it just doesn't work that way. other countries are not the united states. and when it comes to something like this, it's truly a shame. these 3 boys got away with murder. whether it was accidental or not- they got away with it. and everyone knows it. and they have to live with it. i hope someday one of them breaks. you can't hold truth like that in forever. you can't. one day, one of them will slip up. and i hope someone strong enough to tell, will be around to hear it. natalee and her family deserve that much.

for me, i can simply pledge that i will never visit aruba. i won't give them my tourism dollars, and i will talk anyone out of visiting there that asks my opinion about it. i won't recommend it to honeymooners, vacationers, families, or anyone. i had already had this opinion before reading the book, but now i just stand by it even more. i don't blame the entire island for the action of 4 (joran's dad is so fucking guilty as well) individuals, but after hearing how scary matters are handled there, i simply wouldn't feel safe. if something happened to me there, the island would just write me off and say i'm in some drug house and i'll turn up sooner or later. and anyone who knows me knows that's a bunch of crap. i hope that aruba has felt a financial pinch since the natalee holloway "thing" happened. i hope they put pressure on the 3 boys who live there. i hope the locals are sick to their stomach's with how the police handled the case. everything about how this case was handled, was beyond wrong. how do people sleep at night?

Friday, November 02, 2007

hannah montana & greenday???

dude. hannah montana last night was super cute and fun. it was. she is adorable (although in person her mouth was really weirding me out).. blake was freaking out and laughing so hard at the way girls scream during concerts. especially when the jonas brothers were playing. i think he thinks girls are even more crazy than normal.

blake & miley cyrus

but how excited was blake when i told him that billie joe from greenday was in front of us? he was SO excited (he freaking loves greenday)! and what was really cool was that everyone and their dog recognized him. he was so patient and so sweet. he took pictures with all the millions of annoying people (including myself) and posed for pictures. he was really mellow, even though he just wanted to watch the concert with his wife and son (and his wife must have the patience of a goddess). it was really cute to see him jumping up and down and rocking out to hannah montana. but for a split second i wondered if billie joe ever pondered the fact that he has a shitload of 8 and 9 year old fans (they all screamed when he walked in the arena). think he ever sits there and wonders when the hell his band started appealing to kids?!?!? and just how the hell it happened? it's weird right?

blake & billie joe

the best part for me was watching these 2 chicks, who had to be at least 24 years old freaking out whenever the jonas bros were on stage. they were dressed identical (the girls, not the bros) in jeans, tie dye shirts, with black sweatshirts tied around thier waists. they kept screaming and freaking out and insisting that anytime one of the bros looked in the direction they were in, it was because of them. this cracked me up. i think mostly because of their age.... and aren't the j bros like 12? lol

anyway, here are some pics of the adorable hannah montana (miley cyrus) and the jonas bros.. we had great seats!

hm & jb

miley cyrus

hannah montana

Thursday, November 01, 2007

i have no shame, truly.

i've never been embarassed about the music i like. even in high school when i swore up and down that i would marry joey mcintyre from the new kids on the block, i didn't care who made fun of me. mostly cause i would laugh too. but really- i simply never cared. i never felt bad that i liked a group. and in all honesty, why should i? i'm not one to apologize for my taste in anything. that would be like saying i'm sorry for who i am. screw that. i rock!

so i have no shame when i tell you that i love hannah montana! and i really like the jonas bros too! i am SO super excited to go see them tonight with blake!!!! and i'm certain i'm more excited than he is (for now).

speaking of having no shame. did you ever want to see me shake my groove thing? well now you can. video of me dancing has found its way onto youtube, and who am i to deny you the montsrosity that is jennster, dancing to fergalicious??

ps- i just totally wimped out due to the fact that far too many people at work have made me aware that they read this blog- and the last thing i want is my ass shaking making it's rounds via email. wanna see the vid? email me for the link.