Wednesday, February 28, 2007

progress report

i still hate working out.

but i still AM working out.

i still haven't lost a fucking pound, inch, etc.

can you hear me growling from where you are???

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

i might be a little cooler than i originally

thought yesterday.

apparently i'm still huggable.... but only under certain circumstances.

blake will still hug me at school IF we are indoors. and only if that indoors is the inside of HIS classroom. apparently he doesn't care if anyone in his class sees him hug me, but he does not want the older kids to see it. the older kids he can't even play with because this school segregates the 3rd graders from the 4 & 5th ones. (weird)

whatever his rules are- i'm totally playing. if it still gets me hugs in public, i'm all over it. i guess i have a little time left when it comes to blake and hugs!


Monday, February 26, 2007

it doesn't matter how cool i am

blake won't hug me at his school, in front of other kids.

i mean, it's been happening for awhile now- but dammit... everytime he turns and gives me that look that says, "please don't try to hug me mom. not now. not here. not in front of my friends..." my heart breaks just a little. so let me tell all of you moms out there with young kids who can't get enough of your hugs..... ENJOY IT WHILE YOU CAN. because as hard as it is to believe, there will come a day when they won't hug you in public. they will stop holding your hand when they walk. and no matter how many times you try to grab it, they won't let you.

and then you'll be forced to miss the days when they would run full speed to you because they wanted to hug you. they didn't care who was watching. they were so happy to see you they practically leapt into your arms, and squeezed your neck so tight, you could barely breathe. you'll miss it, because those days are now memories. and it's sad. even though it's completely expected and your head totally understands it- your heart hates it.

these are the days when i wish blakey face was little again. with his smooshy face, and deep voice... when he wasn't too proud to hold my hand. hell, he wouldn't walk without holding it. they grow up so fast. everyone says it, but it's true. so hold onto your little ones now. hold their hand as often as they'll let you. hug them in public as many times as you can. because even if it takes them longer than normal to stop doing all these things with you- they will eventually.... stop. and you're never fully prepared for it.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

get your nails did

anyone who gets their nails done can relate to this. this shit is funny. and it's true. it's okay to laugh... it doesn't make you a bad person

Friday, February 23, 2007

once again, we're over here

bitching about grey's anatomy and whatever else!


Thursday, February 22, 2007

luff and stuff

things i miss about southern california:

  1. the weather!!!
  2. getting out of the car at 1:30 in the morning and having it be 73 degrees (shutup boyfriend) i long for those comfortable warm evenings that rarely exist up here
  3. my sister
  4. my niece
  5. my nephew
  6. good friends
  7. working for disney
  8. my silver pass
  9. disneyland & espn zone
  10. blake's friends
  11. the weather
  12. the fact that it's actually warm there
  13. did i mention the weather?
  14. real baseball for blake
  15. people in dodger hats, shirts, etc.. i can never get used to all the giants stuff i see on people up here. *pukes a little*
  16. the fact that my once small little town is now becoming a fully self sufficient city. no longer do you have to leave the city to go shopping, or to a nice dinner. it's all here.. and it rocks!
  17. the radio stations. they exist to further prove how sucky the ones up here are. i think i heard more new songs by artists in 10 minutes, than i have since i moved up here.

things i don't miss:

  1. THE WIND!!!! i loathe the wind.
  2. my commute to/from disney everyday
  3. the fact that they are building on every available hill and piece of land in my once small city
  4. the department i worked in at disney- boring.beyond.belief.

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

working out

so. it's on to week 3 of me working out. i do anywhere from 30 to 45 minutes on the elliptical machine, and call it a day. it's better than nothing, right? and it's way more work out than i've done in awhile. i'm really trying hard to stay with this. i don't know what it is with me and my mentalness when it comes to excercise. i guess it's because i simply don't enjoy it. and maybe it's because i never see results quick enough- so i get discouraged and think "why am i even doing this when it's not fun and i hate it?!?!"

i'll tell you that i haven't lost a pound (and yes, i have totally changed my diet as well). and no, my clothes aren't fitting differently either. what i have noticed, even if it's ever so slight, is that my legs feel firmer when i walk. oh yeah, another thing to note is my appetite. good gravy, since working out- i am HUNGRY!! like i have a serious appetite and a slim fast doesn't fill it. i'm talking about this because i think it's important to chronicle what the hell is (or isn't) going on to my body when i excercise. and i'm hoping that one day, out of nowhere, i'll just start dropping pounds. or SOMETHING. something the inspires me to keep up this torture. because i really want to stick with it until the wedding. maybe by then, it won't be so torturous anymore. maybe it will become something i like doing? maybe i shouldn't get carried away.

my motivation isn't even wedding focused. it's honeymoon focused. i figured that if i'm going to be traipsing around in a bikini for 7 days, i'd better look better than i do now. cause this view- it would scare small children.

Friday, February 16, 2007

for your viewing.. ple.. errr

so, i'm heading off to la.

my brother won't stop harrassing me. so i'm posting pics of him because maybe then he'll stop begging me to post pics of him!!!! hide your eyes. hide the children. hide the animals!!!!

gross out at your leisure. at least kevin charnas will appreciate one of these. ha!





Thursday, February 15, 2007

vday out! st pats in!

like my turnaround on themes? it makes me laugh.

this past weekend we had a going away dinner for sarah. just us girls. and as you can imagine, about 500 pictures came out of that debauchery. but alas, trish thinks work and whatever else in her life is far more important than posting the pictures. hence, i can only show you a couple. *sighs*

i know you dig our neon earrings... don't even front like you don't! and trish made these cute little placecards for dinner! i can't remember where she got the monkey art from, but we were all LOVING it! and no. boyfriend isn't retarded.. he's just playing with the Wii!

glowing earrings are cool

trishalicious monkey face

touch my flower

boys play wii

Wednesday, February 14, 2007


i am halfway through week TWO of working out.

yes, you read that right. i've been working out. everyday. during lunch.

do you think i've lost a fucking pound? no.

i hate this shit. but i'm going to keep doing it. at least until the honeymoon. HA!

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

it's a so cal bridal shower!

so, my southern california bridal shower is this weekend! i know it's early, but if we didn't do it now, we wouldn't have time to do it before the wedding. blake's baseball starts soon and goes until the end of may- so we're showering now!!!! it's a little weird too, because i've been freaking engaged since 2005. two.thousand.five. and i feel like i've been planning this wedding for a billion years- so to do something FOR it, that i'm NOT planning- just seems.. weird? but in like the coolest of weird ways ever! i am super excited to go home and be in southern cali. i miss it. i can't wait to see my family and friends! and to actually feel like a bride to be. i guess that's part of it. while i'm planning and stuff, i guess i don't REALLY feel like a bride. no, that's not entirely true. maybe other people throwing you parties is what makes you feel like a bride?! what the hell is wrong with me?

i hate when i get like this. you know, ramble and contradict myself in each sentence. that's when i should just shut up... but you know i won't. i could tell you about my dream last night. the one where i was 3 hours late to my very first bridal shower. but well, that was pretty much it. ha! okay, shutting up now.. for reals.

Monday, February 12, 2007

free trip to blogher '07?1?!?

okay, so in order to get to blogher this year, i've realized that i will have to win a trip. otherwise, it's simply not going to happen (*waves hi to my fabulous wedding & honeymoon).

i've realized that it's truly okay if i don't make it this year, but have you realized that?! will you be okay not being groped, fondled, molested by the hands of ster?!?!?

i figured for the pleasure of all those attending this year, i'd better at least enter! the good thing is- you can enter too!

head on over to this page where you can write your speech after winning your academy award to be entered to win a trip to blogher 2007! i believe the speech with the most comments wins? something silly like that. my speech is in there.. including the network *bleeping* out all of my curse words. go enter! go comment! just go. :)

Thursday, February 08, 2007

can my body hold onto weight??

i mean seriously. it's been OVER 2 weeks that i have been eating rather well (a few slips here and there). i have literally, not lost a single fucking pound. and i'm wondering- can your body hold onto weight instead of let it go???? because i sincerely feel like that is what my body is doing.

i'm doing what i normally do to lose weight. and usually, i would lose these stubborn 10 pounds, rather easily. not this time. is it because it's winter? honestly. i'm wondering if it's easier to lose weight when it's warm outside because your body doesn't need all the extra layers?? and maybe part of the reason my body is holding onto my ass for dear life is because it's winter and it wants the insulation? i'm grasping here, but i am genuinely wondering if the weather has something to do with it? or stress? or what?!?!

have you ever experienced this? what should i do? i'm not going to give up, but i'm not getting ANY results and i don't understand. help me before i kill something. thanks.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

yet again.. more reasons why i love my work

i will miss sarah terribly (friday is her last day here) *insert tears of NOT happiness here* UNcheers biotch!! this was the last official "circle" lunch. you're either in the circle, or you're out.

we jump. but trish and i jump best!
jumping girls

we fondle
firetruck butt grabbin

we dance with hoses?!!?
jennster loves the hose

we play dress up with the firemen's clothes!
fire girls

we bite!
i bit her cause i could

we play on firetrucks!

we hold you when the world gets too rough.. .
we make sarah stay

and we look completely adorable pretend driving the firetruck.
sarah could not be any cuter

i heart you sarah. super tons. this is my most favorite picture of you EVER! i'm going to print it out and put it on my wall at work. word to your mom... and sarah.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

it's an easy question really..

and then again, not so much.

think about this in the sense of a lot of time has gone by. i don't mean you get into an argument with someone and you apologize right away. i mean, time has passed (years even)- and then an apology comes.

do you think that it is said because it is truly meant? because they actually see that what they did or said (or whatever) was wrong and they want to genuinely let you know? maybe their perspective has changed and they can honestly see what a jackass they were....

or do you think it's said so they can make themselves feel better? maybe they carry around so much guilt for their actions, that the only way to feel better is to apologize. but it's not that they have really even changed their way of thinking- they just want to stop feeling bad about themselves.

i know this is random, but i'm thinking ahead here. and i'm wondering how long it will take before a certain someone apologizes to me for being such a bitch. but that got me thinking about just where the "sorry" will truly be coming from. and who it would truly be for. would it really be for me, or would it be for her? and then when are apologies not selfish? when are they truly selfless?

am i making any sense at all? probably not.

Sunday, February 04, 2007

did you notice

that when you hover over links on this, that little hearts float? i love those stupid floating hearts. go hover. now!

Saturday, February 03, 2007

death and taxes!

i don't want to die.. so taxes it is! and.... MINE ARE DONE!!! are yours?
i hate waiting for my w-2. it is so annoying that it takes forever and a day to get here. i'm ready to do my taxes on january 1st, but noooooo- you have to wait for your w2222222.

anyway- i wanted to help y'all out and give you some links to FREE e-file sites. yes, i said free! woo hoo!
the IRS has a link to a ton of sites that will give you free e-file.. go here,,id=118986,00.html

i filed with these people- federal was free, state was not, but you don't have to do your state with them if you don't want..

Friday, February 02, 2007

my kid- he reads my mind

this was our conversation FIRST THING THIS MORNING as we were getting ready for school and work:

blake: mom, how do you have babies if you're not married?
ster: well, there is something that you have to do to make babies. they don't just come when you get married.
blake: really?? oh...
ster: yep.. but 2 people should be in love and really care about eachother. like your dad and i weren't married, but we had you!
blake: right.....
ster: blake, i really want to talk with you about this, but we need to have more time. can we talk about this tonight and you can ask me whatever you want?
blake: maybe we can have this talk when i'm like 10 or 9.. okay mom?
ster: hell to the yeah!

okay so i didn't really say "hell to the yeah", but that's what i was thinking! although i can already tell that it's not going to last that long. he's slowly coming around to asking me more and more questions and revealing to me that kids at school definitely talk about it and say the word "s e x" a lot. it's coming soon, and let me tell you- i wasn't as nervous this morning when he sprung it on me as i thought i'd be.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

cupid threw up on my blog

sorry for the overabundance of pink folks. but you only have to deal with it for 2 weeks. and it will serve as a constant reminder that suckday is coming up soon.

i hate valentine's day. i think it's stupid. i mean, if boyfriend and i had met on v-day.. or something romantic like that, i'd probably like it more. but in my opinion, it's just a day that is suddenly supposed to have all this meaning for no reason aside from the fact that it exists! stupid. i just really think that if boyfriend is going to go all out and be romantic and really put thought and effort into a day, i'd like it to be a day that really matters. a day that is truly personal to us... you know, like our anniversary! not valentine's day. BUT, to be completely contradictory, i do like it recognized. lol omg, i am a wacko huh??

with all this "i hate valentine's day" talk and then i say "but do something for meeeeee." but it's true. i don't want an overload of stuff. i don't want to go to dinner or have a super romantic night. but i do want something. just a small acknowledgement. a single rose. a freaking cookie the size of my head. just something. because i do something for boyfriend every year. nothing major or hardcore, but just a little something.

do you guys like valentine's day? do you do stuff for it? do you care if he doesn't do anything for you? am i the only wacko who hates it, but still wants something for it?!!